I drew back the baton.  The parking meter looked completely unharmed.  My hand stung.  The baton was shaking.  There was a group of kids with shaved heads or spikey, died hair standing outside of the record store.   *   Jimmy stumbled up the hill and disappeared down the street.  Lights made the streets glow.  Sirens dulled the city sounds and the sound of Punk rock coming from the record store.   *   I was standing there when Christy arrived by my side.  She asked me if she

I march to a different beat than that of the normal creeps I’m not normal I’m about as normal as an aching back The world sometimes looks queer through my strange visions of dialectical solutions and controversial delusion I try to keep my head up high as others stare and sometimes they gawk and I decide not to flip em off It’s the natural disorder where you take two different beasts and try to compare them and align them and make them one and the same with a sort of formulai

1. A guy I knew— somewhat but not well he was a familiar face I’d see from time to time   but that’s all he was I heard he had just shot himself in the face three days ago   My best friend was like a brother is dead too Fentanyl overdose   by accident though I found out they’re lacing the shit in cocaine now too It wasn’t a surprise   Last I spoke to him was a year prior he confided in me he was smoking meth because he drove a truck   In fact a lot of truck drivers do that Th

Sitting on rooftops sifting through back-alley dungeons we were the trembling few gaslit by the corner lights   Fires in dark alcoves a ghost hanging from poles upside-down crosses dangled from the eyes in the sky   We had rotten features friendships becoming sharp the hate of the city locked its talons into me   Another night of chaos when freedom turns the other cheek A bareknuckle street fight the shadows cry themselves to sleep   It’s bliss when you never have to return h

You know the saying “Fake it till you make it”?  That saying got to me.  It really did.  I wanted to make it.  I wanted to be better.  So I faked it until I made it, and now I’ve made it, and I still haven’t stop faking it, because I don’t belong here, and I feel like a fake.  Just tonight I was thinking how delightful it would be if I could rail a pill right now, like maybe some Adderall or Ritalin, something to get me going so I can express myself honestly.  But what for? 

Forgotten dreams Crushed hopes   Faith in nothing I wander as decades   turn to centuries pondering my past   planning my future waiting to die for I know   death is the easiest way to go Only then   will I be successful Only then will I have a blank slate

Oh dark Eris I serve you my fears in the mouth of a rubber ducky   for you to take pleasure in plucking the finality from its eyes like popping a growing pimple   Oh dark Eris I bring you my rancid tongue as I laugh like a behemoth   scribbling my wretched ideologies on the chalkboard of life seizing the day like a spastic as I scramble for faux-validation   In your eyes, Oh dark Eris, I squander the confusion in a sea of rambling raisons   For the truth is absurd as the word

The fire in my eyes turns bright red when I think of certain things I despise   The fire in my eyes grows with rigid fertility when the maddening truths get covered up with lies   The fire in my eyes glows with radiant death when this culture gives birth to another disguise   The fire in my eyes retches gasps & gleams when life’s haunted themes become the only things that shine   The fire in my eyes throws flames listlessly when I divert my focus to another promise left to di

The curtains closed quicker than I knew how to   deal with A life I once knew   closed for good behind pink, satin blinds   The friends of a dark past just actors   in these blackened memories with dark, blurry edges   like burnt Polaroids a mental obituary   a lifetime of empty spaces Turn the page   The world grows darker I trace my finger over   the shadowy outline of a boy I once knew   in a photograph I might have seen   somewhere behind me the lines of history   are sta

A walk through the forest dogs lead the way I notice the scent of cigarette smoke mixing with the smell of   wet birch trees It takes me...

I stood outside unearthed rearranged I had a time   like no other Die fast, live young was the way of the world Undermined by   twisting...

It’s so weird/Being surrounded by other people/All walking somewhere/But going nowhere/It’s a strange façade, pumping iron till your...

The crowd mobbed the side of the building.  There were Punks, with spiky, colored hair, black leather jackets stained & painted, studs...

One of these days all our heroes will die We’ll all be left alone without hope of survival   It’s a magical thing this death How it’s an...

I’m a sucker for pain & punishment.  I love to feel my negative feelings because to me it’s all that seems real.  Just this morning I...